At times it can feel like life is bad on all fronts: you work is stagnant, you personal life is unsuccessful and your personal health, physical and mental, has been neglected. You are not achieving your goals or fulfilling your potential, and you are unhappy as a result. First, know this happens to everyone- you are not alone. Also know that this does not have to be your life, you can change it. You can better yourself. It will take a lot of work, a lot of courage and a lot of grit, but if you keep going and believe in yourself you are going to achieve your goals and be the best version of yourself. Here are some good habits to improve your life in the new year, that will help you reach your goals when it becomes hard to continue:
Stop Sacrificing What You Want Most For What You Want Right Now
It would be lovely to relax, watch a movie or a show, meet a friend for dinner, etc. instead of working longer on a project that needs attention, going to the gym, making dinner at home, etc. Instant gratification is seductive and satisfying, but not when it is at the expense of long term goals, especially goals that will help build your self-esteem and help make progress towards your goals. Stop sacrificing substantive happiness, that will bring you consistent and lasting joy for superficial, momentary happiness, which will fade quickly and ultimately extend unhappiness.
Stop Making Excuses
If you are looking for a reason/excuse not to do the right thing, you will surely find one. Part of taking ownership of your life and reflecting on how you got to an unhappy state is understanding how you are enabling your poor decisions. It is usually with excuses, like you're tired, or you don't have time when you're not making time, you will do it tomorrow, etc. Stop making excuses, and start owning your life and pushing yourself to do the work. Happiness doesn't fall into your lap, it takes work like everything else. So get out of your own way and stop making excuses.
Stop Taking Things Personally
When someone makes a comment, gives unsolicited advice, or treats you poorly, unless you did something to merit a reaction, chances are the comment says more about the commenter than it does about you. Do not let people discourage you, or tell you who you are when they are not close to you. Keep moving forward, build on your progress and do not let people get you down. Not only because you should stay focused and because what they said likely isn't true and doesn't matter, but because most of all it wasn't really about you in the first place.
Exercise
If you need to feel better at this moment, go change your clothes and go get some exercise. Endorphins make you happy; they release stress and help clear your mind. If you want some perspective, go work out first then revisit the issue. Chances are your emotions will be stabilized, your mind will be sharper and you will have less anxiety than you did before you got some exercise. So if you panic and feel overwhelmed by whatever you have been confronted with, try and see if you can get some exercise before you make a decision. You will make a decision that is less reactive and more grounded in reason than emotion.
Eliminate Distractions
If you find yourself wasting a lot of time staring at various screens, constantly checking social media or mindlessly doing things on your phone, start trying to monitor those habits and change them. Whatever your go-to distraction is, start managing it so you can be more productive and stop wasting time.
Stop Playing The Victim
You are not a victim of every whim and circumstance, you do have some control over your life at any given time. It is about how you wield that control that determines whether you change your circumstances. Stop resisting responsibility for your life, because the sooner you take ownership of it and stop blaming others, you will have more autonomy, you will start doing the work therefore you will begin making progress.
Face Fear
Any wildly successful person has failed, sometimes on a massive, humbling scale. No one who is successful will ever judge you for failing, so start summoning your courage and stop being afraid to work hard and fail. The only people who will ever judge you are people who have not failed themselves, usually because they've made incredibly safe choices. So face your fears, stop being afraid of failure and do the work. Doing the work is how you gather courage and begin making progress towards becoming your best self.
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