Can Men And Women Be Friends?

Different Expectations

One of the most common problems that occur in opposite-sex friendships are different expectations and needs,while these obstacles may appear in any type of friendship, there is a potential sexual dynamic that can make opposite-sex friendships complicated.

It’s interesting to know that both men and women list several common characteristics of a real friend:

• You like spending your time with them.
• Also Dynamics between people is equal.
• There is no mean behavior such as gossip or jealousy.
• Expect the same things from the friendship.

Achievement.

Is it possible to achieve this with a person of the opposite sex? Yes, absolutely. Most of these things go without saying and both men and women agree on these values. However, while most of these criteria are somewhat easy to men, one poses a common hardship; expecting the same things from the friendship. This is where most of the problems in opposite-sex friendships come from.

Obstacles

Let’s face it; one of the main obstacles in this type of friendship is sexual attraction, Both men and women voice this as their main concern,However, the nature of this concern is often different, Women see it as an obstacle which can ruin a friendship and, in case something sexual happens, it would cost them both a friend and a romantic partner, Men, on the other hand, do not see sexual attraction as a problem on itself,In fact, most of them believe that having this type of attraction is a good thing for a friendship, What they see as an obstacle is the woman completely refusing the idea of sexual attraction or rejecting sexual advances, which, in men’s opinion, can end the friendship in a bad way.

Difference in attitudes :

These different approaches to issues of sexual attraction make the main difference in attitudes men and women express about mutual friendship, Also, it seems like women are more often in a position to reject unwanted romantic advances from their male friends than they are to develop romantic feelings for a friend,As a result, women are typically more eager to say that they believe in mutual friendship with men and that these situations are not just possible but lead to very strong friendships. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to doubt the possibility of mutual friendships with women.

Another point of concern is gender dynamics of male/female friendship. Even when relationship is strictly platonic, many people continue to ascribe typical gender roles to mutual friendship. For example, women might expect for their male friends to protect them or to pay for outings. Men might expect their female friends to cook for them or to flirt with them.

All of this shows that there are certain obstacles which often appear in opposite sex friendships So Most of these struggles come from different expectations,So, not just within the friendship itself but in people’s overall attitude towards issues such as sex and gender roles.

How to Make a Friendship Work

With all this hardship, is it possible to develop an honest, fulfilling friendship with a person of the opposite sex? Yes, definitely. However, both sides need to be open about what they want and what they expect from this relationship. Even more importantly, their friendship goals should match.

Here are some tips on how to develop an honest opposite-sex friendship:

–Be open

Communication is the key, It’s important to let the other person know what you expect from a friendship:

In other words,What If it seems to blunt to openly talk about the issue of sexual attraction at least try not to lead the other person on by hinting, something you are not interested in.

–Think about the other person

People , often focus on their own desires and needs, but friendship can work only if you care about the other person,In other words, Know what their goals and desires are:

Even more importantly.don’t think that your own goals or desires are more important than the other person’s.

–Talk about the obstacles. 

Again, communicate. There will be problems and there will be awkward moments. Accept it and face it. Discuss about any issues that may arise along the way. If you keep hiding, it will definitely damage your friendship prospects. Even worse, any lack of communication can be interpreted as men and women being unable to understand each other.

–If your feelings change, be honest.

This is the trickiest part, but vital for the survival of your friendship,If, at any point, In other words, you develop a different kind of feelings toward your friend (for example, a sexual attraction), it’s best to let them know. Yes, it may cost you a friend but hiding it won’t bring anything good. Also, chances are that those underlying feelings will damage the friendship one way or the other. So, be honest and respect their feelings. Who knows, maybe it ends for the best and your friendship develops into something more. Or maybe you decide that it’s best to keep it platonic. Both outcomes are okay. Much better than hiding how you really feel and risking to ruin your friendship in the process.

–Have your needs met elsewhere.

Simply put: it’s easier to build a platonic friendship with a person of the opposite sex if your sexual and romantic needs are met elsewhere, Being in a committed relationship with someone else will make it more likely to stay In other words, “just friends”,The ability to meet these needs elsewhere, even if not in a form of a committed boyfriend/girlfriend will make you more open to keep your relationship with this person strictly platonic.

–Don’t let others ruin it. 

Surprised, but despite issues two people may face in an opposite-sex friendship the main reason these relationships break are not misunderstandings over sexual attraction or other issues, It’s the other people:

Most typically, a jealous girlfriend or a boyfriend who does not want their partner to be in friendship with a person of the opposite sex.Sometimes, it’s the same-sex friend who doesn’t like this situation and works on breaking it, If this is the case, have a talk with your partner or a jealous friend,In other words,They need to know that your friend is an important person in your life and that you won’t allow this friendship to be ruined.

Keep in mind: when you are in an opposite-sex friendship you will meet people, day after day, who will attempt to prove to you that your friendship is not possible or that it’s dishonest After that, For the sake of your friendship, it’s best to ignore this sort of “advice”.

The bottom line : yes, opposite-sex friendships are possible, but they are met with some unique challenges, One of the most important things for building an honest platonic friendship is to make it about collaboration, community and joined interests, rather than flirting and sexual attraction After that,Of course, sometimes you cannot help it and yes, sometimes feeling change, but it’s important to have an honest interest in a platonic relationship to make it work from the start

So Can Men And Women Ever Be Friends?

Men And Women Ever Be Friends

It’s the age old debate and one that never seems to fizzle out – can men and women ever be friends? Is it possible that men can get on with women in a purely platonic manner?

Firstly, believe it or not, prior to the 19th century this question wouldn’t have even raised it’s head and the answer to it would have been a firm “no”,But now, things aren’t quite so cut and dried Many years ago, Secondly men and women would never have been friends,They would have met, fallen in love and married and that was it, most importantly, They were unequal in every other way,It was only as more women started to leave the realm of the house to go out to work, joining men in offices, that things started to get more interesting

Research Suggestion

Research seems to suggest that these days men and women can be friends, but only up to a pointFirstly,Men think that they might be able to get on better with girls rather than members of their own sex, but, notions of romance (and let’s face it) sex are never far from their minds.

Secondly ,An interesting study was carried out in the USA ,some researchers requested a core group of eighty eight men and women, all of whom were friends, to take part in a private question and answer session regarding their “friendships”most importantly, This was to test whether men were genuinely being honest about whether or not they really could be friends with females or not,The men and women were asked an identical set of questions regarding their friendships and told not to talk to each other at all about the study or any part of it, Afterwards, the results were collated and the results surprising.

Differences between the sexes

It seemed there was a genuine difference between the sexes and how men viewed getting on with women, and vice versa,For the most part Firstly, the men who were in friendships with women admitted that they were attracted to them, whilst on the opposite side more women said they were NOT attracted to their male friends,The men also believed that their feelings of attraction or lust would be reciprocated, too and were more or less oblivious to the fact that they might not be returned, However, for women, the opposite was true – they firmly believed that if they weren’t attracted to their male friend, the same would be true of them, that they would feel exactly the same.

Secondly ,In a further study that was carried out by the same team, another two hundred and fifty strong group of married couples were asked about the potential difficulties of opposite sex friendships,Most of the women who were interviewed felt that opposite sex friendships could be totally platonic, but the men who were interviewed were on average significantly more likely to admit that romantic feelings were part of the equation,most importantly, stating that in some way, they were attracted to all the female friends they had, Most men felt unable to separate “friendship” and “romance” as two different variables!

Conclusion

So it seems , that on the surface men can get on much easier with women, but, deep down, they are always going to be sizing them up as a potential future relationship, or as being somebody that they might like to sleep with at some point too,If all men thought like women, then the answer to the question would be a definite “yes”, But scratch the surface and it seems like there is something else bubbling underneath ,most importantly, a more complicated desire to turn the friendship into something more…

Olivia Blogger , From https://pleasedwomen.com blog ,

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